December 2009
136 posts
You know what?
When your boyfriend cheats on you three days before New Year’s this whole kissing business kind of blows. So I have decided that Jack (Daniels) is going to be my date tonight. I’ll just carry around the bottle like the giant alcoholic I am. And you know what else? Slutty Kaylie is back. That is all. Goodbye 2009.
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I’m having a really crappy day. A I have been in bed all day and have eaten two pints of ice cream kind of crappy day. :/
Fucking fuck fucker fucking fuck.
More on this later. Time to drink.
Fuck.
6od:
The Fear - Lily Allen
Forget about guns and...
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My family was sitting watching the football game when suddenly my dad starts singing Poker Face. No seriously just randomly broke out into it. Slowly all of our heads turned to face him with our eyes wide and I say “What the fuck?” How did I get in trouble? I think it is a completely justified response. No?
I'm on my way to the hospital
My jackass brother Alex threw me into a wall and I have to get my foot x-rayed. Wait, that makes it seem like a he’s abusing me. In reality I possibly could have jumped on his back trying to tackle him right before said wall throwing incident. Either way he’s an ass. Just sayin’.
So I'm watching Star Trek
You know that part at the beginning? I cry EVERY fucking time.
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I walked into the family room to see my parents...
I turned around and walked out. Quickly.
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I'm going to be an aunt (again) today!
I don’t like this waiting business. Not at all. I have zero patience. This is the first little one I’ve been here for!
A surprising number of bars were open tonight
Empty but open. I was the only girl in most of them.
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“There are victories of the soul and spirit. Sometimes, even if you lose, you...”
– Elie Wiesel
My mom "discovered" Harry Potter
She’s on the 4th book. She’s never read or seen any of the movies and has no idea what happens. It’s like the cutest thing ever. She’s into it. Way to finally catch up, mom.
Who's the best aunt ever?
Field trip to build-a-bear should answer that for you.
Do you think it’s going to be a problem that I brought my nephew with us to get pedicures and now his toes are hot pink? I tried to talk him into a more manly green.
Jerk/Off
dearoldlove:
Being honest about being a jerk didn’t make you less of a jerk.
Today I discovered my brother still wears that Abercrombie cologne. We corrected this error immediately.
You know what I love?
My grandmother for “forgetting” my ex’s name as he tried to suck up to her and then telling him what a pretentious ass he is.
Getting to her about how horrible the ex’s new marriage is, it’s fantastically bad.
My brothers for stealing a bottle of scotch and us drinking the entire thing in about 10 minutes while hiding in a closet.
LAST BUT NOT LEAST, seeing my...
bunkercomplex:
Frank Sinatra - “White...
Remind me
That although coming home for ten days because your brother is having a baby and you want to be all family happy, blah blah blah, might seem like a good idea… it isn’t. I have thirty minutes to get dressed and go to a Christmas party with several hundred people and I want to slap my mother.
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Omg it’s cold outside! I wonder if anyone will deliver pancakes?
